Modesty of The Heart

July 28, 2017



Modesty has become quite an archaic word amongst the world. As believers, we hear about it ever-so-often. I love the encouraging photos of those who feel called to share the message of modesty.The Idea of being able to look stylish as a Christian is one I am all for! I think that people need to see those types of posts for tips and inspiration.


In this post, I want to touch on the fact that modesty starts way before a woman reaches into her closet. If a sister is struggling with modesty, she is struggling with a heart issue. We should first address this before moving on to how short of a dress a Christian woman should wear or about learning cute outfit tips.





We have heard it before, but it is worth mentioning again. Men are naturally attracted to looks, whereas women are mostly attracted emotionally. Of course, there are exceptions to the rule. I have 4 brothers. I can’t count how often they speak about the difficulties of keeping their eyes from women, even in the church.


I believe us girls don’t think about it very often. However, we should! We don’t want to make a brother in Christ stumble. Usually, you know deep down if something might bother a brother.



You can either: pick another shirt, wear it anyway because it’s 'too cute' not to, or wear it with the intent to actually attract guys. We must love God by loving our brothers enough to help them guard their eyes. Listen to the Holy Spirit as He leads you in this. (1 Corinthians 8:13)




As girls, we don’t just dress for ourselves or guys. We style ourselves for each other. When our hearts are not centered on Christ, we want to look cuter than the next girl.


This can be conscious or subconscious. I have found both of these to be the case for me at times. I have passed up a more modest shirt for an occasion, simply because I wanted to look cuter.


That is hard to admit, but I know I am not the only one! If it is conscious, you have an insecurity issue. That, must be brought before the Lord! You must find your security in Him alone, regardless of how attractive you are. There will always be someone prettier than you. Your standards should reflect the Bible, not a human.




As I said before, this is not really a clothing issue. This is a matter of the heart. If you love God, you love His people. If you truly love His people, it would grieve you to think of possibly causing someone to sin.


You may think that you should not have to dress differently; 'guys don’t actually have to look.' No, they don’t, but you are still a stumbling block. Do you want to be that for another child of God? "And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother." 1 John 4:21




Examine why you need the attention? Is it pride? Is it insecurity (which is pride manifested in another way)? There is a reason why you feel the need of the attention of others. God loves you more than any guy can. He sees you more beautiful than any woman can. (Psalm 139:18)


When did this insecurity start? Childhood, bullying, mean friends? Identify the root of this problem. Ask God to show it to you. God will not hide this from you. He loves the quiet and gentle spirit. He is willing to give you this. 


"but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4



You must be more in love with God than man. When this is the case, your clothing will automatically change. You have targeted the heart, not just the physical.


You know when you put on that dress, and you feel that gentle nudge of the Spirit? Yes, don’t ignore that! If you have to question it, no matter how cute it is, don’t wear it. Again, you are doing this for the love of God. This means dying to yourself.





God has rescued you from the bondage of sin. You now belong to Him! He brought you near, by the sacrifice of Jesus. God has also made you one with His Body. You affect the Body, whether you actually see it or not. You are a member of it, and you are representing God.


Do you want to represent God well? Do so in every aspect of your life. You can’t do that without the Spirit’s help. You might even need to ask the Spirit to give you a heart that wants to please Him. Be honest with Him. If you want to advance the Kingdom of God, Your eyes should not be on yourself. They should be your savior.



You should decrease, and He should increase. Your focus should be so much on sharing Christ with others, that you don’t mind sacrificing an outfit for Him. That becomes little in the grand plan of God. (John 3:30)


You have more eternal things to worry about. You have the souls of others that don’t know the Lord to minister to. That is really the key to modesty- A change in your gaze. Lift your eyes off of yourself, and place them on Christ and His ministry on this earth. If you do that, everything else will fall into place.




Now about that cute outfit! Oh, do I love to wear makeup and cute clothing. I love me some cute shoes! I don’t think posting a picture on social media for looking cute is sinful.



I follow fashion bloggers on Instagram. I even post pictures of myself sometimes.  We are all girls and like to make ourselves look pretty. There is no shame in that! (feel free to follow me on Instagram here )


However, if your security rests in how many likes you get, that post was done in sin. If you are trying to get the eyes of the guys on your social media, you are not pleasing God. 


There is a difference between posting a picture of your OOTD because you like it and feel pretty, and posting to get attention from guys. Don't post inappropriate pictures.


Don't wear clothing around guys that you know is tempting.The enemy tempts many of us with this. I constantly have to check my motives. I would encourage you to do the same. I mean really do it!


By all means, post that cute outfit or selfie girl, and tell me where you got those shoes! Just do it with a heart turned towards the Lord.




Have you struggled with this? What has helped you with modesty? I would love to hear your thoughts! Comment below.


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